Sharing

A dozen years ago, I began a process of restructuring my life. I stop using cars, stopped watching or owning a television, became mildly vegetarian (I still eat fish on occasions that I can afford it.) I started using bikes, playing more music, became interested in community, worked at what could be done to make life better for youth and how to decrease the problem of loneliness in the world through sharing time with others. Until one tries this kind of shift in living practices, it's hard to imagine how truly "radical" they are. We've been sold a life based on self-centeredness as "the norm."

Another change is sharing a space. Sharing a meal. Sharing food. Sharing time with people who may not be like us. Who may be elderly. Who may be liberal or might be conservative, when we're not. Who might be younger. Who might have different tastes, talents, or views of the world than we do.

The opposite of sharing is hoarding. For the better part of the past decade, I rented a room beneath a hoarder. By observing this person, I watched "the norm" in action. Possessions were always more important than friendships or relationships. Space was used to collect more, but never to share. She even displayed a cartoon on her refrigerator door that neatly summed up what I attempt to get at here with too many words. It was a cartoon of two women in a cluttered room, one women is saying to the other,"You don't have any room for anyone else in your life." Sharing was not part of her makeup. If she did share, she expected a return, and "with interest" for her act of giving.

Although her outward appearance suggested she had lots of friends, she really didn't. She lived a lonely life. Her life was separated by an automobile shield, an Internet shield, a telephone shield, an iPhone shield, and an inner shield that prohibits giving freely to others. She displayed the illusion of friends as people do on Facebook. Who has this many real friends? Friendship requires a lot of understanding and acceptance that most don't possess.

After eight years, I had to move out, because she needed more space for "stuff" or to use the space to convert it into a space for more car parking. In either scenario, I was second-banana to objects.

There's something truly "new" in rediscovering how to share in a society like ours that teaches us to only hoard. Could you be a roommate that doesn't divide the dwelling and shares common spaces? Could you share your food, or would you divide the refrigerator with "yours" and "mine?" Could you take care of your fellow human being without expecting a pay off of some sort from them?

Would you know how to share with respect, without abusing the rights and boundaries of others? We aren't taught how to do these things.